CT
Alabama Crimson Tide Ranked #1 in USA Today Pre-Season Poll
by Henry Rosenbush on Aug.06, 2010, under CT
On Friday, the defending national champion Alabama was voted 55 out of 59 as the No. 1 team in the USA Today preseason coaches’ poll. Number two Ohio State took the remaining four votes. Florida is ranked third, Texas fourth and Boise State, who also finished last season 14-0, is fifth. Rounding out the top ten are: Virginia Tech, TCU, Oklahoma, Nebraska and Iowa.
Numbers 11 through 15 are Oregon, Wisconsin, Miami, Penn State and Pittsburgh, followed by LSU, Georgia Tech, North Carolina, Arkansas and Florida State at #20 with the final five led by Georgia, Oregon State and Auburn with Utah and West Virginia tied for twenty fourth.
2010 Schedule
Week 1 Sat., Sep 4 San Jose State 7:00 PM ET
Week 2 Sat., Sep 11 Penn State 7:00 PM ET
Week 3 Sat., Sep 18 @Duke 3:30 PM ET
Week 4 Sat., Sep 25 @Arkansas 1:00 PM ET
Week 5 Sat., Oct 2 Florida 1:00 PM ET
Week 6 Sat., Oct 9 @South Carolina 12:00 PM ET
Week 7 Sat., Oct 16 Mississippi 1:00 PM ET
Week 8 Sat., Oct 23 @Tennessee 12:00 PM ET
Week 10 Sat., Nov 6 @LSU 8:00 PM ET
Week 11 Sat., Nov 13 Mississippi State 1:00 PM ET
Week 12 Thur., Nov 18 Georgia State 7:30 PM ET
Week 13 Fri., Nov 26 Auburn 2:30 PM ET
Gator Coma Victim Prefers Vegetative State to Tide Championship
by Henry Rosenbush on Feb.04, 2010, under CT, eXisTenTiaLNihLisT
eXisTenTiaLNihLisT
Football related stuff gives me the willies because no respecting Ex-Nil cares about sporting events so expect some real information hybridized with the usual adult humor but for a change not much profanity. Saving that for the next post…
When Florida Gator fan and Daytona Beach resident Millie Ray Lizzard awoke after 17 years in a coma she was informed by her doctor, an Alabama graduate, that the Crimson Tide won their first national championship since 1992, she promptly asked to be returned to unconsciousness.
For those of you who have been in a coma or didn’t give a shit, the Tide did indeed win their first since oh, whenever. Told you I didn’t give a fuck.
The Tide used a 13-point 4th quarter to turn a 24-21 lead into a 37-21 win over the 2nd ranked Texas Longhorns in a game played at the Rose Bowl on January 7th to finish 14-0, 8-0 in the SEC. After taking out the top-ranked Florida Gators (13-1, 8-0) in the SEC Championship, 32-13, Alabama went into the BSC Game ranked #1.
Ms. Lizzard, who was doing well after awakening, oddly enough, while her doctor was wearing a National Championship pin, was heard to say, “Where am I?” Her doctor, Randall Christian Boondecker, III, said “You are in Tuscaloosa, Alabama!,” to which she replied: “I want to die.”
A few facts that supported her wish for a return to a coma, included:
Rolando McClain won the 2009 Dick Butkus Award while Mark Ingram, the 2009 Heisman Memorial Trophy Winner, rushed for 116 yards and 2 TDs (2 yards in the first and 1 yard in the 4th) while freshman running back Trent Richardson (109 yards) split the defense and ran 49 yards untouched for a TD as the Crimson Tide turned a 6-point first quarter (field goals of 18 and 42 yards by Hunter Lawrence) into a 14-6 Alabama lead and later added a defensive TD on a bizarre play seconds before halftime when back-up quarterback Garrett Gilbert, who came in after Colt McCoy was injured on the fifth offensive play of the game for the Longhorns, on a hit from Marcell Dareus, tossed a shuffle pass that was bobbled and intercepted by Dareus who returned it 28 yards to cap a 24-point second quarter and a 24-6 haltime score.
Gilbert, who finished still as Gilbert went 15/40 186 2 4 (McCoy was 2/2 9 yds), settled down in the second half and threw two touchdown passes to Jordan Shipley and brought the #2 Texas (13-1) back to a closer game with 6:15 remaining before the Tide defense forced a fumble near the Longhorn’s goal line with their first sack of the game and a 32-21 lead when Ingram scored his second TD. Richardson scored a final TD on a 2 yard run with :47 remaining for the final scoring just to piss of Longhorn fans and cock-up the betting lines. Good.
As in any medical situation, the doctor had to prescribe powerful sedatives because Ms. Lizzard began screaming “No! It can’t be.” When the patient, who was involved in an automobile accident when, while under the influence of much alcohol, plowed her 1989 Bronco into a bank of trees off I-95 in South Carolina after visiting her in-laws, who were Gamecock fans, was transported to Florida all experts said she would never regain consciousness. Since her coma began, she outlived her husband, both children and two grand children, all fans of SEC teams, none worth mentioning.
FYI, doctors refused to put her back into a coma but she flatlined when she saw the medical bill and learned of the state of affairs of the health care industry.
As for the game itself, it was watched in frigid temperatures since my central heating system went to hell as it froze over on New Year’s Eve and while it may have been exciting to other fans with heating or sitting in bars I watched it mostly silent, with six cats, all keeping me warm throughout the contest. Nick Saban, high-priced nice guy coach, was so happy he accepted more money and most predictions put Alabama as the number one team this fall, with a key match-up here in T-town with Penn State in September…yada, yada, yada.
Am I happy?
Well, being a Southern Miss grad what the photon does it matter? The Golden Eagles got plucked in their bowl game and Alabama finally acquired the Bryce Hospital grounds they have sought since the dark ages so I guess the higher up muckity mucks are happy.
Guess I did answer that question.
Want to know all the usual sports-related bullshit? The complete stats, video and story go to ESPN: Tide Wins National Championship
Thanks to David S. for the following minutia that only die-hard Bama fans would want to know:
Alabama’s accomplishment this 2009 season:
(1) Defeated teams ranked (in the season’s final AP ranking) #2, #3, #10, #17, and #20
(2) Also defeated S.C. (ranked 22nd at that time) and Auburn, who won its bowl game
(3) Went 10-0 against bowl-bound teams, including winners of Cotton and Sugar bowls
(4) Defeated 4 teams (LSU, FLA, SC, TEX) coached by 4 head coaches who themselves won national championships
(5) Defeated 2 teams (AUB, MSU) coached by men who as asst coaches won national championships
(6) Only 4 teams in a century have ever gone 14-0 in a season
(7) Beat the then #1 ranked team (Fla) in a game, came back the next game to beat the #2 ranked team. That #1 ranked team, after losing to Alabama, then came back and destroyed the #3 ranked team (Cincinnati) in the Sugar bowl.
(8) Alabama had 6 first team All-Americans, the first and only team in history to do so.
(9) Alabama had the Heisman winner on offense and the Butkus winner on defense.
(10) Three of Alabama’s SEC opponents TN, MSU, AUB) had bye weeks before playing Bama (who did not have its own bye week then), two of those leading to the two closest-scoring games.
(11) Bama played its first 8 games without a bye week, and played Nation’s #1 team (FLA) in SEC championship without a bye week.
(12) 11 of the 14 teams Bama played had winning seasons, winning 68% of their total games
Naturally, the veggie Gator fan riff is a ruse and my idea of an early Fools of April gig.
Closest Vote Ever: “Overwhelmed” Mark Ingram Wins 75th Heisman Trophy
by Henry Rosenbush on Dec.13, 2009, under CT
Excerpt of Ingram’s Emotional Speech
NEW YORK–Alabama’s running back Mark Ingram won the Heisman Trophy, Saturday night, in the closest vote in the 75 year history of the award.
The sophomore Crimson Tide player is the first Alabama player to win the prestigious award and finished 28 points ahead of Stanford running back Toby Gerhart receiving 222 first-place votes and 1,276 points, while Texas quarterback Colt McCoy, last season’s runner-up, received 203 and 1,145.
Nebraska defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh came in fourth while the 2007 winner, Florida quarterback Tim Tebow, was fifth. Ingram won four of the six regions. Gerhart won the far west and Suh, the southwest.
Ingram’s emotional speech was profound and revealed to football fans outside the south that he is a humble 19-year-old who, behind a tough offensive line, helped propel Alabama to a 13-0 season, number one ranking and title match against McCoy and his second ranked Longhorns January 7th in the Rose Bowl.
Alabama’s has 12 titles in their long southern football history, including 6 AP, but this will be their first opportunity since the 1992 season when the took a number two team against heavily favored and top-ranked Miami to win in the Sugar Bowl for the their last championship team.
Nick Saban, who won a national championship with LSU in 2002, coached Alabama to a 12-0 regular season record last year, in his second season, before losing the last two, while this year’s team remained in the top ten the entire season mostly as number three behind Florida and Texas.
Ingram rushed for a school record 1,542 yards and scored 18 touchdowns. In last weekend’s 32-13 win over number one Florida he scored three rushing TDs and accounted for 189 yards of Alabama’s 490 total offensive performance.
In his remarks, a clearly surprised and emotional Ingram tearfully thanked his mother, grand father and coach, in attendance, and his father, but the elder Ingram, a former Super Bowl star, incarcerated on bank fraud and money-laundering charges, watched his son’s award speech on a prison television.
The tough 212 football player was visibly moved and several times had to wipe away tears during his acceptance speech. “When he started reading that letter, my heart started beating and I could feel it beating real fast,” he said. “When he called my name I was excited, then I saw my mom crying and it kind of made me break down, too.”
AP, Coaches Polls Rank Alabama Number 1 and Texas 2
by Henry Rosenbush on Dec.06, 2009, under CT
TUSCALOOSA, Ala.–Alabama moved into the top spot, as expected after their 32-13 defeat of previously #1 Florida in the SEC Title Game.
The Gators fell to fifth place behind Texas (2), TCU (3), Cincinnati (4) and ahead of undefeated Boise State (6).
The BSC matchups will be televised on FOX tonight at 7 p.m. CST when it is expected that the second place Longhorns will meet Alabama in the Rose Bowl, January 7, 2010, in Pasadena, California for the National Championship Game.
Both teams are 13-0 and while the Crimson Tide never trailed in their game, racking 490 yards of offense against the nation’s top-ranked defense, Texas barely defeated Nebraska in the Big 12 title match with a last-second field goal to win 13-12.
In an understatement of poor clock management, with 8 seconds remaining, Texas QB Colt McCoy threw an incomplete pass as time expired, which would have given the Cornhuskers a 12-10 win that would have set up either TCU or Cincinnati as Alabama’s opponent; however, instant replay confirmed, rightly, that 1 second remained and Hunter Lawrence kicked a 46 yard field goal to win the game.
Alabama has never beaten Texas (0-7) but this years’ Tide team will be favored in this match up. If the Longhorns are unable to produce a running game against Alabama’s aggressive run defense it could be a long day for McCoy and Texas.
In the AP Poll, Alabama garnered 58 first places vote while Texas took the other two and in the USAToday Coaches Poll, Alabama received 54, Texas 4 and Cincinnati 1.
USA Today Poll
1 Alabama (54) 13-0 1470
2 Texas (4) 13-0 1409
3 TCU 12-0 1336
4 Cincinnati (1) 12-0 1280
5 Florida 12-1 1240
6 Boise State 13-0 1216
7 Oregon 10-2 1096
8 Ohio State 10-2 1077
9 Penn State 10-2 950
10 Georgia Tech 11-2 921
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Roses Fall on Alabama: Tide Cages Gators in SEC Title Rematch, 32-13
by Henry Rosenbush on Dec.05, 2009, under CT
ATLANTA, Ga.—The Alabama Crimson Tide won their 22nd SEC title and will play for their first National Championship since 1992 with a thoroughly convincing dismantling of the top-ranked Florida Gators, 32-13.
In a much publicized rematch of last year’s thrilling SEC Title Game, won by Florida experts all picked Florida to win if the game was close going into the 4th Quarter. In an exclamation point to Alabama’s total dominance, with a 32-13 lead to start the final period, Alabama would posses the ball for the game’s final seven minutes and twenty eight seconds, finishing with time of possession 39:37 to Florida’s 20:23.
Alabama players were seen carrying roses after the win signifying their next playing field: the Rose Bowl in Pasadena for the BCS championship game in January. Florida will most likely represent the SEC in the Sugar Bowl. BSC games will be announced Sunday night. Alabama last won a championship against the Miami Hurricanes in the Sugar Bowl after the 1992 season, beating the #1 Canes when ranked second.
If #3 Texas wins its Big 12 game with #22 Nebraska they will meet the Tide in January for the National Championship. UA is 0-7 all-time against the Longhorns.
Alabama took the opening drive and scored, never trailed in the game, and shut out the Gators in the second half.
The Crimson Tide came in ranked #2 against the top-ranked Gators, winners of 22 in a row (their last lost coming in 2008 to Ole Miss, 31-30) and dominated the nation’s top-ranked defense for 490 yards of total offense, spurred by SEC Championship Game Most Valuable Player Quarterback Greg McElroy 12/18 239 yards and 1 TD. McElroy also provided two exciting runs and a key block on a running play to help UA finish the season 13-0, 8-0 in the SEC. Florida dropped to 12-1, 8-0.
Heisman candidate running back Mark Ingram accounted for 189 yards of offense as he rushed 28 times for 113 yards and 3 TDs, an SEC Title Game record.
Alabama won the opening coin toss and elected to receive which was opposite of the usual deferring to the second half and marched down the field and took the early lead 3-0 on Leigh Tiffin’s 48 yard field goal capping a 9 plays 47 yards in 04:23.
After holding Florida, Alabama ended their second drive with a 7 yard Ingram run but the extra point hit the right upright for a 9-0 lead. The Gators answered with a 48 yard field goal by Caleb Sturgis for their first points and an Alabama lead of 9-3 to end the first quarter.
In the second, after Tiffin kicked his second field goal of 34 yards to up the lead 12-3 before UF QB Tim Tebow hit receiver David Nelson for a 23 yard TD that cut the lead to 12-10 on a quick 4 play 70 drive in 1:32. Tebow finished 20/35 for 246 yards 1 TD and I INT.
This would be the closet Florida would get. McElroy’s short pass to Ingram, at the Tide 28 yard line, turned into a career high 69 yard reception (he finished with 76 yards receiving) down the right side line to the Florida 3 yard line setting up his second rushing TD ending a quick q play drive in 59 seconds and a 19-10 lead. Sturgis would kick a 32 yarder to bring Florida within six points at the half, 19-13.
After holding Florida to three and out on their opening 3rd quarter drive, Alabama picked up where thye left off in the first half with a 5 play 74 yard drive in under three minutes with a 17 yard TD pass to Colin Peek and a 26-13 lead.
The defining drive, however, would mirror last year’s big drive that gave Alabama A 20-17 lead that evaporated in the 4th when Tebow led the Gators on two long TD drives, a 31-20 win and a bertha against Oklahoma and a second National Championship for the one- time Heisman Trophy winner. This time, however, Alabama took the ball at their own 12 yard line with 7:36 remaining in the 3rd quarter and proceeded to march down the field 88 yards in 17 plays and finishing the drive in the 4th with a Ingram’s 3rd TD, a 1 yard run in 8:47 and essentially ending Florida’s hope for a third championship run in four years.
Tebow would throw his only interception of the game, after leading his team to the Tide 6 yard line, to Javier Arenas in the end zone. Alabama would have no turnovers and only one accepted penalty for five yards that occurred on their first TD drive, while Florida was flagged 5 times for 51 yards, including several that continued UA drives in the second half.
Florida’s number one defense gave up a balanced Tide offensive showing with 239 passing and 251 rushing (the most allowed under coach Urban Meyer) while holding the Gators to 335 yards of total offense (246 passing; 89 rushing with Tebow accounting for 10 carries and 63 yards).
In the Heisman race, Ingram, who broke the single-season rushing record, is a top candidate and in the long Alabama football program there has never been a winner. Ingram returned to top form after his poor performance last week against Auburn where he rushed for 30 yards and was injured with hip pointer late in the game.
Midway through the third quarter, with 65 yards rushing, Ingram broke Bobby Humphrey’s 1,471 yard mark set in 1986 with 1,481 on the season. He finished the season with 1,542 yards.





